Sermon Seminar

Next week is a very exciting time for me. Every May I get together with about 150 preachers in Austin and we sit at the feet of the very best biblical scholars in their field to create sermons. Yeah, I know - how geeky! So, for those of you who care, here's what I'll be up to all of next week:

Monday, May 22
6:30 Welcome and Worship
7:00 James Thompson - 1 Thessalonians
8:00 Paul Watson - Preaching the Stories of the Old Testament
8:50 Evening Prayer - Dan Rouse

Tuesday, May 23
8:00 Breakfast (provided by Parish Hermitage)
8:45 Worship

9:00 Tony Ash - Luke
10:00 Rick Marrs - Ecclesiastes
11:00 Thompson - 1 Thessalonians
Lunch Gary Holloway - The Spiritual Life of the Minister (part 1)
1:00 Allan McNicol - From Text to Sermon (Mt. 25:31-45)
7:00 Watson - Preaching the Stories of the Old Testament
8:00 Ash - Luke
8:50 Evening Prayer - Jim Martin

Wednesday, May 24
8:00 Breakfast
8:45 Worship
9:00 Ash - Luke
10:00 Marrs - Ecclesiastes
11:00 Thompson - 1 Thessalonians

Lunch Holloway - The Spiritual Life of the Minister (part 2)
1:00 Michael Weed - Preaching from Colossians (Room 114)

Jeff Peterson - Preaching Romans 14 in Churches of Christ
7:00 Worship at University Avenue - Holloway preaching

Thursday, May 25
8:00 Breakfast
8:45 Worship
9:00 Marrs - Ecclesiastes
10:00 Watson - Preaching the Stories of the Old Testament
10:50 Blessings and Sack Lunches

Classic Movie Lines

I love A Few Good Men. Here's the Jack Nicholson rant from the end of the movie. Go on - do your best Jack voice and have a go at it!

You coerced the doctor! Colonel Jessep, did you order the Code Red?

You don't have to answer that.

You want answers!

I want the truth!

You can't handle the truth! Son, we live in a world with walls that must be guarded. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Lt. Weinberg? I have more responsibility than you can fathom. You weep for Santiago and curse the Marines. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. Santiago's death, while tragic, saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque to you, saves lives! But deep down, in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that wall, you need me on that wall. We use words like honor, code, loyalty. They're the backbone of our lives. You use them as a punchline! I haven't the time or inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the very blanket of freedom that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I'd rather you just said, "thank you" and go on your way, or pick up a gun and stand a post. Either way I don't care what you think you are entitled to!

The 10 Biggest Driver Pet Peeves

The Hagerty Collector Network, the country’s leading insurance company for collector vehicles, surveyed thousands of members nationwide to find out their top complaints about other drivers. Here are their “Top 10 Driving Peeves.” Share your frustrations, and confess which ones you’re guilty of.
1. Distracted drivers talking on cell phones (Motor Mouths)
2. Slow drivers in the fast lane (Turtle Racers)
3. Pushy drivers who tailgate (Piggybackers)
4. Drivers who weave through traffic to gain one or two car lengths (Wacky Weavers)
5. Obnoxious drivers who speed up to keep you from changing lanes (Gap Snatchers)
6. Hasty drivers who change lanes without signaling (Space Invaders)
7. Road Rage (Road Ragers)
8. Motorcyclists who race down the middle of a lane, between cars (Speed Racers)
9. Women applying makeup and men shaving (Driving Divas)
10. Drivers who leave their turn signal on for miles (Morse Coders).

Apple vs Apple vs BBC vs Unknown Cabbie

Last week a London Court ruled on a case involving Apple Computer and the record label owned by the Beatles. BBC called Guy Kewney, the editor of Newswireless.net, to their studios to be interviewed about the court case. When a production flunky ran to the lobby to get Mr. Kewney for the interview he managed to grab a clueless cab driver instead. The poor cabbie, who could barely speak English, was slammed onto the set and suddenly he was being interviewed about a case he knew nothing about. You gotta give him credit. He was on his game, in spite of the look of absolute panic when he realized what was happening. Click on the link in the title where you can watch the interview. Nobody knows who the cabbie is. They're looking for him, and if they find him he'll be an instant Brit celebrity.

I Have Grass!

I have a new passion - yardwork! I used to hate gardening, so I never did it. All I ever did was mow, and only when the neighbors complained, or when Holly nagged. But now, since we bought our own home last December I can't stop. Last week I planted some grass seed in bare spots on the lawn. I watered those spots twice and day, and today, I laid down on the lawn and noticed tiny, tiny sprouts of grass. I can't express how excited I was! I can't wait to water those sprouts. I've been mowing, hedging, moving mulch, planting flowers, fertilizing, watering, and raking. Oh, and I have my own tool shed! It's big and red. We also have a grapevine. We have a tree with a Robin's nest. Last week two eggs hatched. I've been checking on them every day. One day I got too close - the mama bird attacked my head! I've bought a bird bath, and I'm pricing bird feeders. Out back I have a grill, patio furniture, a firebowl, and a hammock. I love spring now. I notice new life everywhere. I am the master of my domain. The king of the castle. the lord of the manor. What a life!